ReTested Book

Faces of Abortion Series

ReTested

The Story of a Post-Abortive Woman Called to Change the Conversation

by Cheryl Krichbaum

Hardcover | Paperback | eBook

ReTested book cover

When dysfunction hit her family, Cheryl went looking for love elsewhere. She settled for sex and soon found herself a pregnant teenager. Not wanting more stress, she chose abortion.

Little did she know that her joy was sucked out of her right along with her baby, and she began to live like the walking dead. She spent the next 31 years fighting to get her joy back.

This raw memoir tells the story of a woman called to change the focus of the abortion conversation from babies and politics to women who make life and death "choices" about themselves.

Follow Cheryl as she learns not just to survive life's tests, not just to strive to fix life's tests, but to thrive through life's tests as she's tested, retested, and retested again.

ReTested book cover

When Cheryl was a teenager, her older sister moved back home with a baby and a mental illness. That’s what shifted Cheryl’s life from spoiled youngest to ignored middle child—while her parents struggled to care for their grandson and their oldest, who would later get a diagnosis of schizophrenia.

Feeling neglected, Cheryl looked for love elsewhere and found herself pregnant. Not wanting to add stress to her home, she chose abortion—and felt justified.

Feeling just fine, Cheryl married and became career-focused until her dead baby’s father chose divorce.

With no intention of marrying, Cheryl began dating and met and married a man who did not condemn her for her abortion, despite his conservative leanings.

Then Cheryl was tested again by schizophrenia, this time her brother’s. How did she respond the second time she was tested by schizophrenia? the third?

During this test, she shared her abortion story publicly. How did Christians respond to her story?

In this raw memoir, you’ll encounter abortion, divorce, mental illness, homelessness, career identity crisis, uninvited judgment, and really good music.

Step into Cheryl’s shoes as she walks through her life tests, learning not just to survive, not just to strive, but to thrive despite heartbreaking circumstances.

Preview of ReTested

Endorsements of ReTested

Abby Johnson says

You just don’t know what people have encountered in life until you walk in their shoes. Cheryl’s raw memoir gives you a walk in the shoes of an abortion-minded woman both before and after crisis.

Kim Ketola says

Abortion affects all of us whether we know it or not. ReTested provides much-needed insight into the pro-choice mindset and the pressures women face before having their choices dictated to them. A compelling memoir that demonstrates how suffering neglect often causes women to dehumanize their own children in the abortion decision. But more, in ReTested there is hope and redemption and grace.

A Few Reviews of ReTested

It is so well written that it sucked me in. I was hooked from the very beginning.
Cheryl Krichbaum's autobiography about both her abortion and her life with schitzophrenic siblings was both emotional and inspirational. Her story tells of the circumstances in her life leading to her choice to abort, the struggles she faced after her abortion, and the redemption of a loving and forgiving God. This honest account of abortion and its lasting consequences is a testimony to the value of all life. It is also very eye-opening about the struggles faced by both those with mental illness and their families. It took true courage to tell her story in such a personal and detailed way. I would highly recommend Mrs. Krichbaum's book, whether you are pro-life or pro-choice.
Cheryl's book drew me into her compelling story of not just one but several struggles and how we all can overcome any struggle and find peace!

Quotes from the ReTested Book

The lie I believed before that night was that i had to perform well to be loved.
The new lie believed was that I wasn't important and that I wasn't worthy of anyone's time or attention.
I react every time I hear someone say "Schizophrenic"
Premarital sex was a stupid decision. It really was. What happens when you have sex? You get pregnant or get STIs. I got both.
I was okay right up until my baby was gone. I could feel my face fall. I wasn't okay any more.
My joy was sucked out of me right along with my baby.
When people asked me "How are you?" I'd respond, "fine," which really meant feeling insecure, neurotic, and emotional.
I would replay scenes in my head and change what I said to what I should have said and said it with confidence.
She made it clear that the divorc did not include her, adn we became even better friends.
I knew that I had killed my baby, even if I wouldn't have admitted it at the time.
I knew in my gut that those words were in the Bible somewhere, but I don't remember reading them. "White as snow"
Once the TV show's storyline included more and more schizophrenia, I stopped watching it altogether.
My former self never would’ve had children nor given up her career to raise them. Yet God continues to form me into the woman he designed me to be, and here I am writing books, speaking, and designing online courses—all the things I longed to do. ~Chapter 6
My boys were very sweet. They understood that I was upset. They let me be. But they also asked really good questions. The best question was, “Mom, why don’t you have schizophrenia?” “I don’t know that I will ever know the answer to that on this side of heaven.” ~Chapter 7
For many years, I thought my testimony was complete. I had survived schizophrenia, and everything in my life was going well. Little did I know my tests were not yet over, and more tests were soon on their way. ~Chapter 8
I didn’t lose 45 years—that was just the beginning. I had another 45 years here on earth… and there was nothing stopping me from serving God all the way to my last breath. ~Chapter 8
I’m a night person! But it was as if the Lord was waking me up and sweetly whispering that he wanted to spend time with me. I felt so loved by Him. ~Chapter 9
Worship-based prayer & Bible study increased the Holy Spirit within me. I was still concerned. I was still heartbroken. But I was at peace & growing closer to the Lord. ~Chapter 9
“If we are negotiating with a mother who is holding a knife to her child’s throat, do we convince her to put the knife down by yelling at her?” ~Julie Mad-Bondo
“We women don’t want to hear from men about abortion because as much as they try, men do not understand. We women are the ones who can change things by talking woman to woman. We need to speak up.” The Holy Spirit was talking through me and to me. What I didn’t know was how much this conversation was about to change my life. ~Chapter 10
The silence and avoidance from Christians resulted in my scarlet letter A for abortion.
Know your audience! The pro-choice movement is full of women who have aborted, full of women who are bitter toward men, full of women who can sympathize with being caught with an unplanned pregnancy or with expecting a special needs child, or with being raped.
It is heartbreaking to think of so many dead babies. It should be just as heartbreaking that women and men are spiritually dead. Non-believers will be separated from their babies forever.
I listened to my playlist while walking the dog, washing the dishes, in the car—and sang, too, if no one else was with me. I worshiped the Lord, and He gave me peace and patience. ~Chapter 10
Russ was right. God had a plan, and it was better than mine. ~Chapter 1
Psalm 46:10 in popular translations says, Be still and know that I am God, but the NASB says: Cease striving!
From that day on, I realized the more I worship God in all circumstances, the more Holy Spirit peace I have as I live through all circumstances. ~Chapter 12
Why people don’t choose God is as baffling to me as my brother not choosing to stay with us. ~Chapter 14

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